Cinderella Syndrome

Cinderella ... a beautiful, sweet girl ... mistreated until someone notices her true worth, then raised to the status of princess to live "happily ever after". Snow White ... a beautiful, sweet girl ... mistreated until someone notices her true worth, then raised to the status of princess to live "happily ever after". Ariel from the Little Mermaid, Belle from Beauty and the Beast ... the list goes on and on, and the theme is the same. All these stories teach us as women an interesting lesson. If you persevere long enough through your trials, you will one day be noticed and applauded for who you are, and that recognition will be the thing that brings you to the point of living "happily ever after". What an unproductive and damaging moral to teach our little girls. How damaging that was for those of us who are now women trying to live under the shadow of such fantasy!

What if life is not designed as a direct trip to a "happily ever after" created by Prince Charming? The journey of life doesn't have a destination that is contained within this life. Maybe we will never truly feel appreciated for all that we are. Some will always be looking for that perfect someone who will rescue them from the turmoil of their lives. Why is the divorce rate so high? Why are so many people on anti-depressants? Why are we so selfish in our actions, living in a constant state of dissatisfaction? Because the illusive goal of being rescued and living forever happy looms over us from childhood.

Ladies, what if we embrace the difficulty? What if we learn to embrace that we can act in kindness and love and not have anyone constantly appreciate us in a way the elevates us to a permanently honored status? And what if we can do all this and journey through this life not thinking about what our reward will be, and when we will get it? I think that is where peace and happiness reside. It is the true and only definition of "happily ever after". When we find contentment in the imperfect journey, and move forward through it with light steps and peace in our hearts, then we have arrived without Prince Charming coming along to make it all perfect.

I choose to let my Prince Charming off the hook. He doesn't have to create "happily ever after" for me. I am the only one who can create that within myself. As a result, I choose to present to my prince a better, more stable, less self-centered, trustworthy, peaceful wife to accompany him on this life journey.